I wish I could go back to simpler times.
When I didn't have to worry about what time it was and when I need to feed the Squid next.
When I didn't have to worry about keeping an entire house clean, but only a room.
When I wasn't changing diapers and clothing (Squid's and mine) constantly.
When I didn't have to juggle a wiggly baby.
When I didn't have to worry about how much food I am producing.
When I could go to the bathroom exactly when I need instead of waiting until Squid is content.
When love was young and innocent and silly.
When I only had to pack for one instead of two.
When there were inside jokes.
When I only needed my keys, wallet, phone, pants.
When I had a job that I loved and looked forward to.
When there were movie nights.
When there were spontaneous hang outs.
When there was The Chronicles of Starnia.
When there were friends who were my age.
When those friends were going through the same thing I was.
When I could call someone up and immediately jump in the car and go hang out.
When I didn't have to constantly worry about money.
When I could be a kid even though I was a teenager because I didn't care.
When I didn't have to wonder who my friends were.
When there was always a furry happy pup waiting for me at home.
When friends would call up and say, "Let's go do something!" and I could.
When I didn't have to pack a diaper bag before leaving the house.
When my arms, shoulders, and back didn't hurt all the time.
When we went to the park at 10:00 at night and threw our cares away.
When I didn't have to always bite my tongue.
When dates were just plain fun instead of long, intricate planning to make it perfect.
When I could take my time getting up in the morning.
When I could read any time I wanted because I had the time.
When I didn't have to worry about compromise or sacrifice.
When I wasn't so angry or frustrated all the time.
When I didn't have melt downs because I didn't feel noticed.
When I didn't always have doubt.
When I didn't have so much responsibility.
Can we go back to those times?
September 15, 2016
"Beauty and the Clockwork Beast" Book Review
(From the backcover of the book)
One of my favorite things to do is to read, but since I became a mother over two years ago, I find it hard to find time to read. And then I find it even harder to find a book that I like enough to read all the way through to the end. That definitely was not the case with Beauty and the Clockwork Beast by Nancy Campbell Allen. I made time to read, read when I knew that Squid was occupied enough, and read every night before going to sleep. To put it simply: I COULDN'T PUT THIS BOOK DOWN!!!
Let's start with a little back story: On August 4th I received and email from Deseret Bookshelf (like I do often) with the above description as the subject line. I immediately opened it and read the following synopsis:
When Lucy Pickett arrives at Blackwell Manor to tend to her ailing cousin, Kate, she finds more than she bargained for. A restless ghost roams the hallways, werewolves have been reported in the area, and vampires luck across the Scottish boarder.
Lord Miles himself is clearly hiding a secret. He is brash and inhospitable and does not take kindly to visitors - even one as smart and attractive as Miss Pickett. He is unsettled by the mysterious deaths of his new wife, Clara, and his sister, Marie. Could Miles himself be to blame for their deaths?
Working together, Miles and Lucy attempt to restore peace to Blackwell Manor. But can Lucy solve the mystery of Miles? Can she love the man - beast and all?
Talk about an attention grabber! I then read it aloud to FATMAN! who also took immediate interest. There's just one thing that held us both back... it's a romance novel. I loathe romance novels (and movies), unless they are romantic comedies. I have always thought that romance novels give a false illusion as to what love is and have always steered away from them. But I kept reading the synopsis over and over again and finally made a decision that if I ever got the chance, I would buy a copy and at least give it a chance. Two days later I found myself in Deseret Book searching for the book, opening it to the middle to test the writing style of Nancy Campbell Allen (I haven't read anything else by her), and rushing to the counter to buy it. I then read the first chapter aloud on the trip home. I would have read more but my throat had started to get rough and I was running out of water. I read a couple of more chapters and then had to put the book on pause when the last of the N.E.R.D.S. book came in special order through the library. BUT as soon as I finished N.E.R.D.S., I immediately jumped back into Beauty and the Clockwork Beast.
I honestly don't even know where to begin! I LOVE this book! I love everything about it, even the romance. There's supernatural elements, Steampunk technology and fashion (which I'm starting to get into), two murder mysteries to solve (yes, that's a small spoiler), and action! Oh my goodness, I was happily surprised at the little bit of action that was in it. But what I think I love the most are the two main characters, Lucy Pickett and Lord Miles Blake, and the transition they make from being so independent to needing to rely on each other and the vulnerability and frustration that comes with feeling true love, despite obvious flaws.
I love that this book is a "proper romance" and that it's very clean in general. There's no sex, no descriptive nudity (but nudity is mentioned in general when absolutely necessary), there is one very mild swear word, and there's no rude or vulgar jokes, stories, sayings of any kind at all from any of the characters. This is a truly clean and proper romance novel, even if the romance part of it is not the forefront of the story.
The mystery and supernatural elements are the biggest part of the book and that's what really drew me in and made me want to keep reading even when I had responsibilities to tend to, Little Bug to take care of, needed sleep, etc. It really was a sacrifice and took a great amount of effort for me to tear myself away from the book to go do things. I had to keep it in the other room (out of sight, out of mind) to keep myself from reading all day long. Ghosts, werewolves, vampires, and mediums are everywhere you turn while reading. And I like the take on vampires that Nancy Campbell Allen writes. Vampires being able to walk and live among regular people with help from an illegal medicine. They can turn into mists of black and travel quickly. They have a great ability of strength and to see in the dark. The werewolves she describes are just as impressive with their heightened senses, even in human form, the build and strength of the creatures, even the personalities of the creatures in wolf and human forms and how they relate to each other. But wait until you meet the ghost who is haunting Blackwell Manor! Oh, the description, the horror, the excitement!
I think I'm going to stop here because I feel like if I keep going, I will spoil everything. A small word of caution: this book is a little intense. If you don't like being sucked in and wondering in excitement and (a little bit of) fear, DO NOT pick up this book! I guarantee that your interest will be grabbed and held onto until you finish the last word. I highly recommend Beauty and the Clockwork Beast by Nancy Campbell Allen to anyone who loves a good book. If I didn't already have another book in my possession lined up to read next (and FATMAN! didn't want to read it), I would have immediately flipped back to the beginning and started it all over in a heartbeat.
And I haven't even mentioned the amazing Steampunk technology and fashion. I just love the detail that is given for the different outfits, transportation, and tools.
September 7, 2016
N.E.R.D.S. Series Book Review
A little over a year ago, I found a book called NERDS at Goodwill. I read the synopsis on the back and immediately had to get it. After finishing the book I was reading at the time, I started reading it and fell in love with it right away.
The National Espionage, Rescue, and Defense Society (or NERDS for short) series is written by Michael Buckley for kids ages 8-11 (geared more towards boys). There are 5 books in the entire series and it follows 5 elementary age kids who are given "upgrades" to help fight against all sorts of villains to save the world.
Each of the books follows each of the 5 members of the NERDS team and gives you an insight to what it's like to live a life being a secret spy at the age of 11 years old and what their different superpowers are capable of. From eating and secreting glue to super allergies to braces that can form anything, the superpowers that these kids were "upgraded" with are truly ingenious! I loved the creativity that Michael Buckley comes up with. All of the different superpowers, gadgets, headquarters are all completely different from what you may have seen in other spy movies, TV shows, books, etc.
And the villains! They are just as imaginative as the superpowers. There's a boy who dresses up as and lives with squirrels who have been trained to become his army. There's another villain who has moved up the criminal chain from goon to villain who wears a ski mask with a skull on it who just wants things done correctly the first time he asks. A boy who goes into an alternate universe and comes back as a big head who can destroy the world with just a thought. And those are just a few. There are MANY more villains as you keep reading the books. They are all obsessed with taking over the world and the way they plan on doing it is hilarious.
But what I love the most about these books is that every few chapters Michael Buckley has a different challenge that every NERDS agent had to go through in order to qualify and become a spy. There are physical challenges, mental challenges, situational challenges and they are all ridiculously fun!
If your son (and/or you) are looking for a fun, imaginative, spy series, I highly recommend the NERDS series by Michael Buckley.
Order of the books:
NERDS: National Espionage, Rescue, and Defense Society
NERDS: M is for Mama's Boy
NERDS: The Cheerleaders of Doom
NERDS: The Villain Virus
NERDS: Attack of the Bullies
August 19, 2016
The Golden Rule of Marriage
Every newly wed couple is told "Don't go to bed mad". I've dubbed this the golden rule of marriage because it is told to everyone!
But what about other emotions? What about going to bed upset? Or disappointed? Or feeling guilty? Depressed? Frustrated?
A few nights ago I went to bed mad, absolutely fuming. I hardly slept. Even though I'm at the last leg of my pregnancy, I didn't sleep because I was so mad and hurt. I couldn't not dwell on what was said and it kept me up most of the night. When I did sleep, it was not restful. The next day I was groggy, felt icky, and just wanted to go back to bed to sleep, but I was able to get past letting the madness fill me. Am I still mad about what happened? Yes, but it doesn't matter anymore because I've done all I can to remove myself from the problem.
The other night, I went to bed upset and feeling a little guilty, even though I was not at fault. I ended up staying up later than I normally do, but that didn't really help with shedding the feelings I had. Because of the other night when I went to bed mad, I took a sleeping aid right before bed and was out as soon as I got comfortable (which is hard with a baby bouncing around inside you). I slept through most of the night, but the next morning I still felt upset and guilty. I have done nothing wrong and yet the situation that presented itself has rocked me. It will certainly take more time for me to come out of this one.
There have been many nights where I have gone to bed sad and/or depressed. Not the best option, but at least I can sleep when that happens. And in the morning I usually feel a lot better about whatever happened.
So, maybe the rule should change to "Don't go to bed if you know you aren't going to sleep well." Or maybe you should just sleep elsewhere so that you don't keep your spouse up all night with you. I hate this "rule" because no one is perfect and even talking things out doesn't always work. Sometimes you just have to go to bed mad, frustrated, sad, depressed, upset, or otherwise because there's nothing that will instantly make everything better.
But what about other emotions? What about going to bed upset? Or disappointed? Or feeling guilty? Depressed? Frustrated?
A few nights ago I went to bed mad, absolutely fuming. I hardly slept. Even though I'm at the last leg of my pregnancy, I didn't sleep because I was so mad and hurt. I couldn't not dwell on what was said and it kept me up most of the night. When I did sleep, it was not restful. The next day I was groggy, felt icky, and just wanted to go back to bed to sleep, but I was able to get past letting the madness fill me. Am I still mad about what happened? Yes, but it doesn't matter anymore because I've done all I can to remove myself from the problem.
The other night, I went to bed upset and feeling a little guilty, even though I was not at fault. I ended up staying up later than I normally do, but that didn't really help with shedding the feelings I had. Because of the other night when I went to bed mad, I took a sleeping aid right before bed and was out as soon as I got comfortable (which is hard with a baby bouncing around inside you). I slept through most of the night, but the next morning I still felt upset and guilty. I have done nothing wrong and yet the situation that presented itself has rocked me. It will certainly take more time for me to come out of this one.
There have been many nights where I have gone to bed sad and/or depressed. Not the best option, but at least I can sleep when that happens. And in the morning I usually feel a lot better about whatever happened.
So, maybe the rule should change to "Don't go to bed if you know you aren't going to sleep well." Or maybe you should just sleep elsewhere so that you don't keep your spouse up all night with you. I hate this "rule" because no one is perfect and even talking things out doesn't always work. Sometimes you just have to go to bed mad, frustrated, sad, depressed, upset, or otherwise because there's nothing that will instantly make everything better.
August 5, 2016
No, I Haven't Fallen Off the Face of the Earth
My dear readers,
I just want to quickly say thank you for reading my blog and no, I haven't fallen off the planet. I have simply (dang pregnancy brain) forgotten that I have this blog. But I have also been busy. July brought on a couple of trips home, false alarms about labor, frustration, heat, and overall craziness.
The Squid (now being just a few weeks from his birthday) has decided to become a full on Terrible Two Toddler before his second birthday. He's been very disobedient and rebellious and, frankly, I don't know how much more I can handle! It's crazy how my sweet little angel is now so picky, says no to everything, and doesn't listen to me. So that's been frustrating.
My sister got married in the middle of July. That was interesting to say the least. Let's just say that I'm glad it wasn't my wedding, but I wish that certain people had minded the schedule that was put together (though one incident was my fault), especially when it came to eating food. It was good, but things did not go smoothly. But it was great to have some time off from work (both FATMAN! and I) and to just relax after all of the chaos with my family.
Then work started up afterwards again. I love my "job" as a Jamberry consultant. I truly do, but everything has its ups and downs and July was a small down after April, May, and June. (Things are already looking up for August!) So that was a little bit of a bummer, but not quite as frustrating and/or stressful as it was for FATMAN!. He manages the store that he works in and summer is the busiest time of the year. So he (and I) prefer to have as many employees in the store as possible during summer. At the end of June, the assistant manager took a different job and moved away. It was a great opportunity for the assistant manager, but that left FATMAN! one employee short. AND he isn't getting a replacement for another couple of weeks. So he's gone all of July missing his assistant manager and he's had to pick up hours, clean up any messes caused by other employees, and do the manager and assistant manager responsibilities. He has definitely been stressed and run ragged. I am so grateful that he has sacrificed so much so that I can stay home with the kids.
Speaking of kids, Storm, our puppy, has also become a brat. And I'm going to leave it at that for the sake of lengthy blog posts.
Then a couple of weeks after my sister's wedding, I had the opportunity presented to me to go to a meeting at Jamberry Home Office. So I convinced FATMAN! to make the drive again to my parents' house and I was able to go to a very wonderful and much needed meeting. I got training, motivation, new ideas, and I got to go with my sister in law! It was great! (Not to mention the free and discounted stuff I got.)
On top of all of these events, it's summer. It's hot and miserable. On top of that, I'm near the end of my pregnancy. I hate summer in general. I hate being hot and sweaty and exhausted. This is my second summer pregnancy and I knew what to expect as far as pregnant in summer goes, but I never thought this time around would be harder to cope with. I thought my little angel would stay an angel a little bit longer, I didn't think my unborn son would cause me so much pain and worry (referring to the false alarm labor scare I mentioned earlier), and I certainly didn't expect that my husband would be so much busier and more stressed from work and other things in our lives. I am just over 7 weeks away from my due date. It's going to be the longest 7 weeks of the summer. I can say that with confidence because this whole summer has been LONG! I hate being pregnant in summer and I will never do it again, but I can't wait to meet my little boy.
Sorry for going on a ranting spree. I just needed to get it out in a different form. Thanks for sticking with me. Hopefully, I'll remember to post more often until D day.
I just want to quickly say thank you for reading my blog and no, I haven't fallen off the planet. I have simply (dang pregnancy brain) forgotten that I have this blog. But I have also been busy. July brought on a couple of trips home, false alarms about labor, frustration, heat, and overall craziness.
The Squid (now being just a few weeks from his birthday) has decided to become a full on Terrible Two Toddler before his second birthday. He's been very disobedient and rebellious and, frankly, I don't know how much more I can handle! It's crazy how my sweet little angel is now so picky, says no to everything, and doesn't listen to me. So that's been frustrating.
My sister got married in the middle of July. That was interesting to say the least. Let's just say that I'm glad it wasn't my wedding, but I wish that certain people had minded the schedule that was put together (though one incident was my fault), especially when it came to eating food. It was good, but things did not go smoothly. But it was great to have some time off from work (both FATMAN! and I) and to just relax after all of the chaos with my family.
Then work started up afterwards again. I love my "job" as a Jamberry consultant. I truly do, but everything has its ups and downs and July was a small down after April, May, and June. (Things are already looking up for August!) So that was a little bit of a bummer, but not quite as frustrating and/or stressful as it was for FATMAN!. He manages the store that he works in and summer is the busiest time of the year. So he (and I) prefer to have as many employees in the store as possible during summer. At the end of June, the assistant manager took a different job and moved away. It was a great opportunity for the assistant manager, but that left FATMAN! one employee short. AND he isn't getting a replacement for another couple of weeks. So he's gone all of July missing his assistant manager and he's had to pick up hours, clean up any messes caused by other employees, and do the manager and assistant manager responsibilities. He has definitely been stressed and run ragged. I am so grateful that he has sacrificed so much so that I can stay home with the kids.
Speaking of kids, Storm, our puppy, has also become a brat. And I'm going to leave it at that for the sake of lengthy blog posts.
Then a couple of weeks after my sister's wedding, I had the opportunity presented to me to go to a meeting at Jamberry Home Office. So I convinced FATMAN! to make the drive again to my parents' house and I was able to go to a very wonderful and much needed meeting. I got training, motivation, new ideas, and I got to go with my sister in law! It was great! (Not to mention the free and discounted stuff I got.)
On top of all of these events, it's summer. It's hot and miserable. On top of that, I'm near the end of my pregnancy. I hate summer in general. I hate being hot and sweaty and exhausted. This is my second summer pregnancy and I knew what to expect as far as pregnant in summer goes, but I never thought this time around would be harder to cope with. I thought my little angel would stay an angel a little bit longer, I didn't think my unborn son would cause me so much pain and worry (referring to the false alarm labor scare I mentioned earlier), and I certainly didn't expect that my husband would be so much busier and more stressed from work and other things in our lives. I am just over 7 weeks away from my due date. It's going to be the longest 7 weeks of the summer. I can say that with confidence because this whole summer has been LONG! I hate being pregnant in summer and I will never do it again, but I can't wait to meet my little boy.
Sorry for going on a ranting spree. I just needed to get it out in a different form. Thanks for sticking with me. Hopefully, I'll remember to post more often until D day.
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