Let me preface that this was my answer to a question FATMAN! asked me the other day. To help with conversation at dinner and to make our marriage stronger, I printed out some random questions and stuck them in a jar. Every night one of us chooses a question (or two) and we talk about it. The other day the question was, "If you had to write a paper about your day, what would the title be?" FATMAN! liked my answer so much that he suggested that it be the title of my next blog post.
My poor Squid has been struggling with constipation on and off for the past couple of months. And it seems like this time is worse than any other instance. Nothing seems to help. Normally I would go to the doctor, but every time I go to make an appointment or go to an already scheduled appointment, he explodes! So I haven't called the doctor... yet. But I have tried pumping his legs, giving him a tiny bit of juice, essential oils, tummy massages, every solution I have found online and nothing. I have even started him on solids early to see if fruits and vegetables would help. But still nothing! (No, I have not tried prunes yet because Grandma and Grandpa, who bought the solid food, couldn't find any and I have yet to go to the store since coming home from my last trip.) It is so heartbreaking to watch my son grunt and push and grunt and groan and push and cry and have nothing come out, especially since everything I have done has not helped at all.
One thing that has been beyond frustrating for me is that Squid won't stick to a schedule. {Enter angry scream here} When we moved right after he was born, I did my very, very best to get the Squid on a schedule so that I would have time to help out around the house while he slept. Though it took some time, after a couple of weeks I got him on a reliable schedule and I did my best to help with chores and such. But ever since we got back from Christmas vacation he hasn't be very reliable. He's only slept a few minutes here and there rather than sleeping for at least an hour during every nap time. He sleeps right after eating rather than waiting a while. The only thing that has been consistent is when he eats and that is only because I actually have control over that. Maybe it's the teething. Maybe it's the constipation. Maybe it's the fact that he was constantly passed around all day long during vacation and hardly had the chance to stick to the schedule. Maybe he's simply growing out of naps. I don't know what's going on with him, but it has proven difficult these past couple months or so to get anything done around the house. (It's a miracle sometimes to post here every week.)
Oh, the loveliness of teeth. Unless you are a teething baby. In that case, teeth are your worse nightmare, after being pushed and pushed out of a hole you don't fit through. The Squid has been teething for about a month (for sure) and has had his ups and downs. He now has a tooth just covered by a thin layer of gums just waiting to cut through at any moment. He has been doing extremely well with the amount of discomfort new teeth can be. He loves putting whatever he can get his hands on into his mouth and gnaw on it, fingers (anyone's), thumb, pacifier, teething right, blanket, burp cloth, etc. It all goes in the mouth.
And because everything goes in his mouth, there is soooo much drool! Drool all over his hands (which then makes them cold), all down his front, on his legs from leaning forward, all over FATMAN! and myself, everywhere! It's a wonder he hasn't drowned himself with so much drool.
Of all the frustrations that have come with being a mother the worse of them all is that I don't always know what my sweet Squid needs and he can't tell me. Most of the time I can tell what it is that is bothering him, but lately I feel so out of tuned that I question every day if I'm a good mother. But then I do something to make him smile or giggle and I am reassured once again that I am a good mother.
No one has ever said that motherhood is easy. Only that it is worth the remarkable rewards.
*UPDATE* The Squid has pooped, but he still struggles and it breaks my heart even more so.
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