August 7, 2017

Early Morning Thoughts on the Couch

As I'm laying here on the couch early in the morning, yet again, all by myself, I can help but have the following thoughts:

I miss this. 
I miss being able to watch whatever I want whenever I want. 
I miss being able to wake up on my own without any crying or screaming.
I miss being able to do whatever I want whenever I want. 
I miss not worrying about two littles.
I miss not being in so much debt from creating littles that don't even look like me!
I miss being comfortable.
I miss sleeping the morning away.
I miss going to sleep at night and not being woken up by a little hand smacking my face.
I miss not being a mom.

But then I walk down the hall to wake up Squid. As I open the door and see that he's awake, I can't help but crawl into his tiny bed and snuggle with him as he tells me about his dreams and have the following thoughts:

I missed you.
I missed playing with you all day long. 
I missed helping you get food, get dressed, etc.
I missed holding you in my arms.
I missed telling stories with you.
I missed doing puzzles with you.
I missed chasing you around the couch/house just for fun.
I miss your brother Kickboxer.
I missed being a mom. 

Motherhood is so weird. You hate being a mom and being responsible for two littles and can't wait until they are in bed so you can have a minute to yourself. But as soon as you get a moment to yourself, you miss those littles and just want them with you all the time. 

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